i had a feeling last night that i’ve never felt before.
i was suffocating, gasping for breath as my chest convulsed in nightmarish ways.
the thoughts that raced through my mind crippled me to a state of such disarray i couldn’t pull myself from.
numbed to my pain, powerless. i had no choice but to lay there and let it consume me. pulling me down, far past any sense of hope.
and in that moment, i felt utterly withdrawn. i felt neither here nor there nor present at all.
i could feel my entire body rattling.
my arms, tightening their grip.
my heart, screaming to be held.
and my eyes, washed away with these blurred perceptions of a world i once recognized.